Cauliflower Rice + Cheese Sauce

A homemade alternative to cheesy rice

Please note that not everyone is tolerant to all foods, and I am not telling anyone what to eat. This should be viewed as simply an exercise in creativity.

Cauliflower ricing is the simple process of grating cauliflower florets into smallish, white grains. Since vegetables are not as calorie dense as actual grains, they serve as satisfactory substitutes for classic high-calorie foods like mac and cheese, with the benefit of adding fiber, vitamins, and nutrients to your diet if they’re not overcooked.

Cheese sauce is something most people can love. In fact, I used to make vegan cheese sauce as my job. I won’t spoil their recipe because it’s not the one I use. I just blend a few vegetables, salt, nutritional yeast, and homemade coconut or oat milk. Since the rest of the recipe uses no animal products – if you are really hungry you can make a vegan cheese-meat sauce using some textured vegetable protein (defatted soy flakes – TVP). With the fat removed you’re less likely to experience any morphological changes since sex hormones are usually lipids. Some hormones are peptides though, which are small proteins.

To start, I chopped up carrots, half a diced onion, and a golden beet and boiled them in water seasoned with mustard seed, cayenne, cumin, and salt. Then I riced some cauliflower into a bowl, tossed in some onion, added salt and pepper and dry-steamed it in foil. While the cauliflower steamed I strained the mustard water from the cooked vegetables and pureed them in the food processor along with some nutritional yeast and milk*.

With the cauliflower steamed to al dente, I moved them to a sauce pan heating up some balsamic vinegar, coriander, and tamari. The fully prepared cheese sauce was then added to the pan. Finally I decided to add soy flakes to the sauce for some more texture and sub- stance. Soy flakes are easy to make from TVP. I simply added the flakes to some of the extra water I had from the cheese sauce vegetables and added some molasses and tamari to change the color and for a more robust marinade. Once they were hydrated fully, I stirred the soy flakes into the cauliflower rice and cheese and began to eat nonstop.


*Note: homemade milks are pretty quick and inexpensive to make, especially oat milk. Just soak 1c of oats in 4 liters of water (more or less for a different consistency), blend, and separate the solids out with a strainer if desired. I’d recommend letting the oats sit overnight, pouring off the water, and letting them sit for another 8 hours, pouring off the water, etc. This process causes the oats to “sprout”, whereby they let their phytochemical guard down and become more digestible. Coconut milk is a bit more expensive depending on where you live, and the process is slightly different. First crack open a young coconut and collect the water in a blender. Then scoop out the coconut meat and add that to the blender. Blend until smooth and repeat blending with added water if the consistency is too thick.

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